The Impact of Being a Gaming Parent

[Before you read I would like to state that this was not written by
me, I am not a mother of a 16 yr old :) I just felt that this article fits here.]

We've all heard it before, "Video games are bad for kids". The
press, some celebrities, religious leaders and of course
politicians want to blame events and actions of our children on
video games. This is our opportunity as gaming parents to prove
them wrong.

Video games mean so much more for parents. Being a gaming parent
means more quality time with our children and more sharing. It
gives us insight to what our children enjoy and gives us control
over what our children do.

Although I was a gamer when I was a child and young adult, I
lost touch with the gaming world until after my son was born. I am
the mother of a 16 year old son. Being close to my son has meant
stepping into his world and enjoying what he enjoys.

My son's gaming began on a used Nintendo 64 at around the
age of eight. His games of choice then were Banjo-Kazooie
and Super Mario 64. It had been years since I picked up a
console controller. I played badly at first but I would sneak into
his room at night while he was asleep to practice and hone my
skills. His gaming time was limited because he was young and
reading and learning were more important at his age; each night we
would play for an hour and on weekends a couple of hours per day.
We would take turns on the controller. I would usually only play if
he was having a hard time getting through something. We each would
have our attempts at defeating the unbeatable bosses. I shared in
the excitement when after 20 grueling tries he would finally
beat a level or boss and I would bask in the hugs, kisses and
pride when I beat a level or boss he could not defeat. And yes
I even spent late nights while he slept looking for hints and
walk-throughs.

After a few years on the Nintendo 64 and a few years
older his attention was set on the Nintendo Gamecube. His
first love on the Gamecube was Luigi's Mansion and then
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Shortly thereafter it
was the Xbox and PS2. His favorite game on the Xbox was Halo:
Combat Evolved. I watched him play campaign and shared in his
triumphs and then the ominous question came "Mom, can I play
online?" This was my time to shine as a parent. My answer; "Get the
other controller." We hooked up to Xbox Connect and with some of my
son"s friends and were live within minutes. At first we created or
joined rooms where only my son's friends and a couple of their
parents could play. Then together we ventured in to the
world of multiplayer with unknown rivals. Sometimes we would get
profane kids but they would be booted from the party immediately. I
was REALLY bad at first. I had never actually played campaign with
my son; just watched. My son and his friends constantly called me a
"noob". I practiced for hours at night just to be able to look up
and walk at the same time. My skills and enjoyment of the game
began to increase. My son would have his friends over and we would
all play Halo until the wee hours of the night; laughing,
giving each other high fives, eating junk food and ribbing each
other if we died too quickly. On one of those nights my defining
moment came that proved me a gaming parent. A kid we had been
playing with was talking "smack". Nothing profane just the normal
stuff like "you suck" and "I can beat without trying" and "my dad
could beat you". My son, bless his heart, says "Dude my mom can
beat your dad." What? No pressure here! The kid gets his dad on and
he and I exchange hellos and then game on. My heart was pounding,
my palms sweaty and the boys were cheering for me. In the end I
beat his dad. He and I had a great opportunity as parents to teach
all the kids a lesson; sportsmanship. We exchanged the good
games and talked about the game a bit and his son played with us a
bit more. The light hearted smack talk continued and in the end my
son's favorite line to the kid was "dude my mom beat your dad in
Halo". They laughed. We still laugh about it.

With the release of Halo2 the gaming together continued
for years with my son and his friends. We ventured into Match
Making together and found a good group of friends to game with. I
would hear some of his online friend's stories about school,
getting their drivers license, how they did on tests and some of
his friends that were in college and how they were doing; a great
group of friends and people in general.

I then found a website for older gamers that not only let me
enjoy my gaming with my son but other gamers that had similar life
experiences; 2old2play.com. The site offered me a choice
from over 9000 gamers to play with that share a lot of what I
share. Many are married, some are single. They have homes, cars,
jobs and stress. Sometimes we talk about our kids, some ask for
advice and insight or help; but we all share our lives and love of
video games. Many of us have met face-to-face. We get together and
play. We all relieve our stresses together. Many of us have
children that we game with; the majority in fact. It is a safe
haven for gaming adults. I have made real-life friends that share
what I love.

Present day; my son has moved onto PC gaming while I remain a
console gamer. He still picks up the Xbox 360 controller every once
in a while and still games with me when new maps come out for Halo2
and still enjoys playing some of the other games with his friends
every once in a while. I am still a die hard Halo fan and play
every night with my friends and am involved with 2old2play.com
doing whatever I can to help. Even though I don't play PC games I
understand what my son does and still share in the joy when he
reaches a goal. A couple of months ago I found myself dropping
everything to watch my son play <i>Shadow of the Colossus</i> on
his PS2. It was a beautiful game to watch, the creativity and game
play; I sat in awe. My son even appreciated the artistry involved
in creating this game. I watched almost every minute that he played
and we talked about the features in the game. Gaming has brought a
new level of closeness between him and me.

Now that you've read my tale of our gaming experience you may
ask, "What is the impact of being a gaming parent?" Look closely at
the text that I've bolded; these experiences are the impact. We as
adults are the purchasers of these games for our kids and
ourselves. We are the leading buyers in the industry. At some point
as parents we can choose to let video gaming be another wall
between our kids and ourselves or we can pick up a controller or
put our hands on a keyboard and become part of our children's
lives. In the time of technology our kids will game in some way.
Parents have the opportunity to venture into the world of
technology with their kids or stand on the side lines.

I challenge any politician to read this story and tell me that
video games are bad for MY son. In fact the opposite is true. What
you find in this short story of our lives is an experience of
togetherness, love, understanding, friendship and sharing. One
simple thing, gaming, it is what makes us closer. For some families
it's sports or music; for my little family it's video games. In
fact this is only a small sample of why video games are good for
our family and others like us. Go ahead, tell me that all of these
great things are bad for my son. Then I will ask you what you do
with your children that leads to a better understanding of them,
sharing with them, talking with them, that allows them to open up
to you, that impacts their lives. I control what my son sees, plays
and hears. I have taught my son lessons through video games and
made myself available to him to open up and communicate. I control
what video games my son buys. I share in my son's life and love of
video games.

I am an impact on my son's life because I am a gaming
parent.

Source: http://www.2old2play.com/News/The_Impact_of_Being_a_Gaming_Parent